Four reasons why we hate change
I may know exactly what I want to achieve. I have conquered my fear of failure and my relationship with self-discipline has improved. Unfortunately, sometimes it feels as though there is an invisible force holding me back.
Have you ever felt this way?
This phenomenon is called the status quo bias. This is extremely frustrating yet very common, so please don’t feel like you are the only one experiencing it, we all have!
It can attack the most self-disciplined and determined individuals. The good news is that once you understand how it works, you can fight against it and continue pushing toward your goals.
The sunk cost fallacy
In psychology, one of the most well-known self-defeating behaviours is the sunk cost fallacy. It explains why we remain stuck in our circumstances even though we would rather be elsewhere. Some examples are staying in an unfulfilling relationship or keeping a safe but boring job even though you have the opportunity to get better employment. In the world of design, it is fairly common for us to get attached to old creations, although we know they have become obsolete.
The sunk cost fallacy occurs because we are not purely rational decision-makers, and are often influenced by our emotions. When we have previously made an investment into a choice, we are likely to feel guilty or regretful if we do not follow-through on that decision. The sunk cost fallacy is associated with the commitment bias, where we continue to support our past decisions despite new evidence suggesting that it isn’t the best course of action.
The status quo bias describes the human disposition to cling to what we are familiar with instead of reaching for the unknown — Daniel Walter
Loss aversion theory
Why do I choose to stick with the same jobs, people, and ambitions? A number of reasons have been put forward to explain this behaviour. One reason is based on the loss aversion theory, which stipulates that in general, we don’t like losing things, and this is true even if the thing we lose wasn’t of high value. Before moving onto something that is perceived as better, we want evidence to prove that it is going to enhance our lives before detaching ourselves from what is not serving us.
If you are reading this at home, pause for a second, and look around you. Can you spot anything that could easily make its way to the bin without compromising your life? I bet you can! I recently scanned my house for things that I could get rid of, and guess what’s ended up in the bin? Nothing. Loss aversion simply overtakes me.
Although making a change often leads to a more positive outcome, on a subconscious level, we assume that change will do us more harm than good. Even positive change, such as moving to a nicer home or getting married, requires a lot of thought. There is always a cost associated with change, and most of the time, we don’t want to pay the price.
The fear of regret
Another reason for the status quo bias is the fear of regret — no one wants to make a change and then regret it. Typically, this is because we feel that friends, family members, or loved ones will judge us for our mistakes. As a result of this fear, we tend to stick to what we are comfortable with. The fear of failure is why we don’t like change, but the reality is that failure is not final — it’s not the end of the world if we don’t get it right. All successful people fail at some point in their lives, but they use their mistakes to make better decisions in the future.
Everything you want is on the other side of fear — Jack Canfield
The mere exposure effect
Another powerful mind trick that keeps us bound to the same old behaviours, beliefs, and routines is the mere exposure effect. Research have shown that the more we experience a particular phenomenon, the more we are likely to accept and like it.
For instance, a study found that the more participants were exposed to symbols and words, the chances of developing a positive affiliation with them increased. We experience it in our personal lives all the time, where the more we interact with an individual, the more we find ourselves liking them. Another example would be the relationship we have developed with face masks during the pandemic. In London where I live, it has become compulsory to wear a face mask in public transport. When we were asked to change our habits and cover our faces, guess what? Nobody liked it! A year later, I wouldn’t be able to see myself boarding a train without face covering. And to be totally honest, I would the first one give a nasty look to those who don’t wear their face masks. There are definitely exceptions to this rule because in some cases the more we are exposed to something the more we notice things that we don’t like.
The mere exposure effect has its advantages and disadvantages. The good news is that if I am working toward improving my self-discipline and developing better habits, when self-control becomes the norm to me, there is less chance of me reverting back to my old ways. The more time I spend operating with a positive mindset, the more I will become comfortable with it.
The disadvantages are that the natural human tendency to hold on to bad habits will make it difficult to develop good habits. I might have a desire to get up on Saturday morning and start working on my goals, but because I’ve spent the majority of my life sleeping in on Saturdays, I will have a hard time dismantling this habit. The trick is to keep reminding myself that the more I get up early, the easier it will become.
Regret is worse than failure
Now that we understand the status quo bias better, let’s think back to times in our lives when we have attempted, or had the opportunity, to change something but failed to persevere because of it. We may find ourselves saying things like, “Well, I’ve always done things like this so there’s no point in changing it now.” Or, “I can’t see that there’s any major problem here, so it doesn’t make sense to change anything.”
Remember that the status quo bias is guaranteed to do one thing — and that is to keep you safe. It will also ensure that your hopes and dreams are never fulfilled — Daniel Walter
In the long run, we will probably regret not taking action. We shouldn’t be afraid of failure; we should be scared of regret. The feeling of looking back on our lives and wondering “What if…” will torment us worse than the feeling of having tried and failed. Fortunately, having some self-awareness about this will help us make better decisions in the future.
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